King George Strikes Back

At the Citadel we like to keep a close eye on all things Star Wars. Hey, it passes the time. Anyway, there’s a story going around the net at the moment regarding demi-god George Lucas. His Highness was spotted on the set of ‘Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skulls’ recently wearing a rather cryptic t-shirt:

GL

If you can’t make it out, the writing on it says “Han Shot First”. Now in case you’ve been living under a rock for the last 10 years (which wouldn’t surprise me given some of the mail we get) you’ll realise that this refers to a rather controversial change that Lord George made to ‘Episode 4: A New Hope’ back in 1997 with the release of the Special Edition. Originally Han Solo shot Greedo without warning in the Cantina. But in 1997 His Excellency decided to change this scenario and inserted a different shot with Greedo actually shooting at Han first and missing. Point blank (dumb-arse Rodian). Nerds the world over were shocked as they felt this suddenly re-defined the character of Han Solo, shifting him from being a bad-ass cold blooded killer to a dick who got lucky because a piss-weak bounty hunter sitting 2 feet away couldn’t shoot straight.

In 2004 with the release of the Original Star Wars Trilogy on DVD, Master George decided to tweak the scene again, having Han and Greedo shoot at each other at the same time. Even with a second attempt Greedo missed (idiot) but at least now the scene looked cooler. Han even did a little shuffle to the right to make it look more convincing (although it just goes to show what a huge favour Solo did Jabba by off-ing that useless bug-eyed freak). Some nerds were placated. Others still hungered for GL’s blood.

Could it be that George All Mighty has finally succumbed to fan-boy pressure? Has he admitted the errors of the past by donning a bit of clothing that he knew would cause an internet maelstrom? Do we care? Personally, I could care less who shot first in the Cantina. The character of Han Solo hardly rests upon this fleeting moment within the Saga. Being inducted into a tribe of Ewoks is far more relevant to his persona. Anyway, let us know what you think of King George’s wacky choice of apparel.

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4 Responses to “King George Strikes Back”

  1. The most important thing about Han’s entire journey and character creation is the fluffy hood he chose to wear in Empire. Homeboy rockin it in da snow.

  2. suburbanknights Says:

    Han is da Gangsta, y’all. No wonder he busted a cap in Greedo’s green ass.

  3. I’d say the comment “Laugh it up fuzzball” would have to be the highlight of Solo’s career. As far as who shot who first I think the end result speaks for itself. Get on with the movie and lets try and find the blue line around Jabba in the next scene.

  4. suburbanknights Says:

    Blue line? Huh? More info, please!

    Fact is: Solo OWNS Bounty Hunters. I mean, he off-ed Greedo, no worries and then managed to fuck-over Boba Fett without looking while blinded! I’m no expert, but in my book that spells ‘OWNED’.

    Also, little known fact: Bossk and Dengar were also on Jabba’s Barge when it went KA-BLAMMO! Point is: seems that the only qualification you need to be a Bounty Hunter in a Galaxy Far Far Away is to be a card-carrying dumb-ass.

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