Posted in Death Sentences on September 15, 2009 by suburbanknights
Ok, so I wrote a brief entry back in June about how I really dig KOTCS and how I’m getting sick of nerds trashing anything Lucas does. Sometimes King George must wonder why he even bothers getting outta bed in the morning.
So anyway, I caught this quote today from Harrison Ford on the Ain’t It Cool News website:
“The story for the new Indiana Jones is in the process of taking form. Steven Spielberg, George Lucas and myself are agreed on what the fifth adventure will concern, and George is actively at work. If the script is good, I’ll be very happy to put the costume on again.”
I got two words to say on this: “FUCK YEAH!”.
I don’t shy away from the fact that KOTCS had its problems. But overall I find it a thoroughly enjoyable piece of escapism and old school fun. Let’s hope Spielberg, George and Ford build on the lessons learnt from KOTCS and deliver another kick arse Indy film in the not too distant future.
And maybe you so-called ‘fans’ can just quit being so freakin’ cynical and remember why you enjoy the Indy films in the first place.
Damn Global Economy…It’s bad enough the stupid US Market screwed with our economy, now it threatens the much anticipated GREEN LANTERN MOVIE! Sons of bitches!
THIS ARTICLE reports that the production of the Green Lantern film may be in jeopardy due to the rising strength of the Australian dollar. The film was due to start shooting out here in 2010. One of the main reasons Hollywood likes to shoot in Australia is because of the better value for money. Now, with the value of the US dollar slipping, it seems the Green Lantern producers are having to reconsider where to shoot the film.
The release date for GREEN LANTERN has already been pushed back once. If the production moves location then certainly it will push the release date back further. I’m already struggling with the fact that I gotta wait 2 years for this thing. Any more delays and I may need therapy.
Hey fans. Thought I’d just let you all know that after more than a year, SUBURBAN KNIGHTS Episode 2: DEATH CRUSH is finally complete.
“Well, where the Hell can I see it?!” I hear you all cry out in unison. Sadly the answer is: “Well I’m afraid you’re just gonna have to wait!”
“But why, you bastard?!” you’re no doubt yelling at the screen as you read this.
Well the reason is that we’re planning on screening Episodes 1 and 2 back-to-back at a major Melbourne facility in a couple of months. The screening is really a ‘thanks’ to all those who helped us put SK2 together. We really want SK2 to premiere on the big screen and get as many people along as possible so we can all come together and rejoice in the brilliance that is SUBURBAN KNIGHTS.
If you’d like to come along to the FREE screening, please let us know. As the screening is private, we need to have a complete guest list on the door. This is to both keep the facility happy and to avoid any undesirables trying to sneak a peek at some real art that they would, quite frankly, fail to comprehend.
EPISODE 2 will be online immediately following the screening. So all you International fans (and there are millions of you) will be able to see the film just a few hours after the premiere.
So in the meantime, stay tuned to the SK BLOG. Screening details are due to be confirmed within the week. It should be a fun night. So please let me know if you’d like to come along and we’ll add your name to the list.
Found THIS ENTRY over at GEEKDAD on Wired. It’s yet another article about Star Wars vs Star Trek. The author makes some rather sweeping observations such as this:
To the casual observer, Star Trek and Star Wars look a lot alike, beyond the obvious similarity between their names. Each has a lot of spaceships, strange worlds, ray guns, and aliens, many of whom look startlingly like humans with prosthetics and makeup.
which are quite honestly just bollocks. He fails to acknowledge the fact that Star Wars is cool, exciting, hard-core, cutting edge SciFi Fantasy whereas Star Trek is just gay. He also determines that Trek is superior. He arrives at this conclusion by applying his own lame, low self-esteem fueled logic. Nerd.
Anyway, check out the article and vote in the poll. Star Wars is winning anyway which just goes to show that yet another nerd got it WRONG.
It’s an image from the upcoming second series of the CLONE WARS Animated TV series. I must confess, I’ve only seen a few episodes from series 1 of the Clone Wars. This is due mainly to the shit-house timeslot it found itself in no thanks to the numbnuts running the programming schedule at Channel 10. Anyway, I have the movie and the first 10 episodes on DVD which I’m yet to get round to watching. But I like what I’ve seen so far.
Looks like the second series is gonna be jammed packed with heaps of Bounty Hunter goodness. Let’s just hope Channel 10 revises their timeslot for this ground-breaking show.
Apologies in advance: I’m posting this from the iPhone so if spelling is a bit erratic then its due to the fact that I’m typing in haste. Anyway, as you know we’ve been following the progress of the GREEN LANTERN MOVIE pretty closely. We love GL. He’s gotta be the coolest character in the DC Universe, hands down.
Anyway, it seems the role of Hal Jordan has been culled down to 3 contenders: Bradley Cooper, Ryan Reynolds and Justin Timberlake.
All I can say is: go Bradley Cooper! The idea of Timberlake playing the Emerald Crusader is enough to make me vomit blood. I’m sure director Martin Campbell will be championing Cooper. At least I hope that’s the case… The very fact that Timberlake is even in the mix smacks of studio intervention. Fuck off Timberlake! Stick to your white trash dance music bullshit and stay the Hell away from my beloved GL. You are not and never will be worthy of playing Hal Jordan.
UPDATE:aintitcoolnews.com is reporting that the role has been awarded to Ryan Reynolds. For mine, he’s not the perfect choice but he sure shits on Timberlake from a great height. Looking forward to this project finally getting up and running now!
Found this little gem on YOUTUBE today so thought we’d share it. Man, it’s amazing how far chat shows and the marketing of films have come (as good or bad as that may be). The vibe here is so subdued and casual. Incredible really, considering Hamill and Ford are promoting the sequel to the largest film of all time.
Good to see morning show hosts were just as stupid 30 years ago. Shit, 30 years…
Enjoy.
UPDATE: Sorry, guys. The nobs at YouTube deleted the videos. Drag. They were really cool too. Harrison Ford and Mark Hamill circa 1980 rapping on all things Empire. Cool shit. Anyway, hope some of you managed to catch the vids while they were still active…
UPDATE 2: He he…found new links! Eat that YouTube!!
Further thoughts: It’s interesting to note that Hamill and Ford were aware of Prequel plans even back in 1980!
Posted in Death Sentences on July 2, 2009 by suburbanknights
Ok so I’ve seen Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen twice now. And twice I’ve felt the need to write a review. But you know what? I’m not gonna.
I know what you’re thinking: “Darth, you slack son of a bitch!”. And you’d be right. But the fact of the matter is that just too many reviewers have beaten me to it and probably voiced the opinion that myself and so many others that grew up on Transformers have: that this movie is really pretty shit.
Don’t get me wrong. I quite like the 2007 Transformers film. OK, it’s not a brilliant Transformers movie. But its a fun, good-looking, reasonably well-rounded bit of entertainment. We all know Michael Bay is a total dick, and elements of the 2007 Transformers film just make me wanna slap Bay repeatedly across the head, but its positives generally outweigh its negatives. And for that I give it credit.
But if ever there was evidence that Bay and his cronies should be strung up by the nuts, it is Transformers 2.
The film is an utter mess, from the incoherent narrative to the shockingly mixed soundtrack, the voice acting, the human acting, the direction, the photography, the digital FX. Everything. A total fucking mess.
Writing a review for Transformers 2 is hard. Its hard because there is just so much wrong with it that it’s nearly impossible to know where to begin. So as I said, I’m not going to review it. And I’m going to assume that most of you have already seen it. It’s well on its way to breaking all kinds of box office records. But I’ll guarantee you, this film will nose-dive in its second and third week of release as repeat ticket sales will no doubt drop right off.
So rather that review it, I’m just gonna compile a wish list for Transformers 3:
Gimme more robot screen time. The film is called ‘Transformers’ for Christ’s sake! Enough with the lame-arse humans and testicle jokes. And really, how many times can you show dogs humping before it gets a little tired?
Enough with the pouty, bent-over hot chicks who are wasting valuable screentime when I could be looking at Transformers involved in an actual plot.
Can the Transformers actually have conversations that we can follow? The times in which the Transformers actually converse with one another are too few and when they do its some kinda incoherent mumble mixed with a barrage of mechanical sound effects and using accents that are so over the top that it becomes utterly incomprehensible. OK, so I managed to follow some of the Transformers’ dialogue, but does anyone actually know anything the Doctor said? Who casts this shit?
Just write a simple, cohesive story that doesn’t introduce retarded characters like The Fallen into an already richly populated universe. The characters we had from the first movie were fine. Just develop their stories further. Megatron is a great villain. The Fallen is a total waste of mine and everybody else’s time. Please develop the dynamic between Starscream and Megatron. As fans we know these two hate each other. There’s your conflict, bitches! Use it!
Reboot the franchise with completely different robot designs. When I say different, I actually mean the designs they had in the first place before Bay and his gang of fucktards got a hold of them. The current designs are just too damn fussy. It gets nearly impossible to define the characters’ outlines in the midst of a battle. The boxy, goofy, boldly coloured designs of G1 Transformers were great. Let’s get back to it!
Enough with the tight, 24 frame edits. Pull back from the action a little so we can see what’s happening! The 1986 Transformers Movie dealt with the Constructicons coming together to form Devastator in a much better way than Bay did in Transformers 2. When a 20 year old animated film is doing a better job than a $240M 2009 blockbuster, you know you’re in trouble.
Give us Cybertron. This whole notion of Transformers just dropping out of the sky is just too weak. Cybertron would be a great location for future films. Bring it back!
Sack Bay.
I dunno. I guess that’s enough for now. Please submit some further additions to the list. I gotta lay down. My head hurts.
Posted in Death Sentences on June 26, 2009 by suburbanknights
Renown nonce and all-round nut-job Michael Jackson is dead apparently.
Funny, I thought Jackson died somewhere around 1986 and we’ve just been watching his re-animated corpse dance around for the last 20 odd years. Certainly his ghoulish appearance and broken, zombie-like speech patterns of late would seem to suggest that was the case.
As students of Popular Culture, it’s probably assumed that we here at the Citadel should be sad to mourn the passing of a so-called icon of Pop. But we’re not. Jackson’s music was rubbish. You can only ride on the success on one good album for so long. And 25 years is too long to ride. And lets face it, Jackson is more famous now for what he did outside the recording studio, rather than in it. You know, things like dangling babies off balconies. The kind of idol behavior we should all look up to…
As a famous Stormtrooper once said as he stood upon the burning, sun-kissed sands of Tatooine: “Move along. Move along…”
